Love and marriage

I’ll never understand those who would chose the ways of hate and fear over those of love and acceptance.

When I think about the recent events, I go there first.

What comes next is: I can’t relate to people whose only way to validate their own life is to pass judgement on another’s.

And it’s really hard for me to move on from there in any rational, meaningful way.

I try not to dissolve into spinning frustration or raw anger, both are easy to do. And kinda worthless and more hurtful to oneself than anything else. Not that I deny my anger, I welcome it, and think it’s equally harmful to deny it. But like every other human impulse, it needs control. I find it best to remember than to actually try to use.

Not surprisingly I‘ve been reading many reactions to the recent gay marriages and the measures some are proposing to stop them. Some have been by friends, some by strangers. Some have been reasoned debate, some contemplation, some out and out rants and wails. I value them all and am very pleased to see people raise voice and prove polls and pre-conceptions wrong—even Andrew Sullivan.

But the one I think I’m most in line with is the post made by the estimable Wil Wheaton.

Even to liking the principles that founded this country. And on a side note, given the spin that this issue has taken, let me say I even admire the teachings of Christ, there are a lot of good words to live by in them.* It’s what people have gone on to do with them or the acts they claim to commit in their name that disgust and anger me.

Many of his points I have read before: that this is about politics and not morality and that the attempt to prohibit same sex marriage is about hating homosexuals and not about saving families.

But the thing that Wil said that I really like:

Even though there are thousands of gay and lesbian couples affirming their love for and commitment to each other, my marriage—my affirmation of love and commitment to Anne—isn’t threatened at all. As a matter of fact, the only people who can really “threaten” my marriage are . . . well . . . the two of us.

And there’s the thing really. To be a threat, to really be a threat to something, you have to take an active interest in it.

And, I’m sorry Mr and Mrs Joe America, but those gay couples getting married in San Francisco? They just don’t care about you or your marriage. Like all humans, they are selfish and more focused on their own lives and doing the best they can and grabbing as much joy as they can. And I doubt they envy you, sorry again. They may desire to have the same protected rights as you and to be recognized as equal citizens like you, but that’s a long road from envy. Hope this doesn’t hurt your feelings or rob you of the new purpose you think your marriage needs.

*Not sure why so many Christians chose the message of Jehovah over Christ, but that’s another story. I’d also like to point out that just someone is quoting Scripture, it doesn’t mean you’ve found a Christian.

This, that, some other…

Well, I’m still gunning to get a redesign to this site up soon and finally start Wode. I’m going to pick March 15th as the date for that. As for the comic Journal, I’m going to be kind and honest with myself and put off its debut until May, when I’ll be between Dicebox chapters. And I’m going to be a little lazy and not update the dates on the intro pages to both of these comics until I update the site design (you’ll know when I do, it’ll be a totally new color palette).

Oh, my report for APE 2004: I hooked up with a lot of great people, had some nice conversations, ate a lot of great food and even picked up some comics. That’s about it.

Ah, I’ll probably do a more complete account, after Kip gets the pictures he took up. Yes, for once I was not the photographer—there might even be pictures of me this time. (You have been warned.) But I do want to quickly thank our fabulous host Patrick.

Naturally, one on the topics of conversation had in San Francisco was about the upcoming elections. Seems we are all a bit on the liberal sides of our respective families and are oft argued with the spectre of the intention of the Founding Fathers dragged in as an example of why we are wrong.

You know, I went to public school in the 70s, during Bicentennial fever and was taught plenty about the Founding Fathers and their intent. Wouldn’t say I agree with all they stood for, but I do feel they got a lot right. Like how protest is a sublime expression of the human spirit—questioning authority and not blindly or quietly following.

In fact, here’s a fine quote I saw this morning on a flyer calling for a protest here in Portland on March 1st from Founding Father Benjamin Franklin:

Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety.

And here’s another goodie from ol’ Ben:

There never was a good war or a bad peace.

On a related note, here’s a link to a 1946 educational film called Depotism that begs the question, “What sort of community do you live in? Where would you place it on a democracy/despotism scale?” (found via Portland IMC.)

The Pier has it’s proper home…

…and Kip and I are in San Francisco, well, North Berkley actually. we are crashing with the one-and-only Patrick Farley as we attend APE this weekend.

And for those of you wondering where the hell this week’s Dicebox is, well it’s up over at Girlamatic. I confess, ’tis only half a page. I an effort not to drive myself and everyone around me crazy, and in honor of the fact I was putting in twelve hours a day at the day job until I left for APE, I will be doing half page updates this and next week. But as page 29 is a whopping 9 panels, it still should be satisfying chunks each time–it also divides in half quite nicely. Also, this will help me re-align with Wednesday proper updates with a minimum of pain and fuss.

I actually updated last night while still recovering from jetlag and much good sushi and jazz enjoyed with our gracious host Patrick. Poor Patrick actually has to work today, so Kip and I are left to our own devices. Not that we don’t have access to much that is entertaining in the Bay Area. If nothing else, we could always go over to San Francsico and watch the people in line to get married. (Another great photo album here.) I swear this is just the most heart warming bit of civil disobedience I have ever heard of.

Mysteries before coffee

As I was walking to work today, I encountered a fellow walking in the opposite direction who dressed in standard street fatigue layers with a bed roll on his back. When we came to be five feet apart, he stopped suddenly and said, “The trails are all choked, time to doke and smoke.” Apparently the proper response from me was an uncertain chuckle, for he made a similar chuckle and we passed on.

About a mile later I came across a sidewalk chalk drawing of the symbol for a muted trumpet.

What you don’t knowÉ

And excellent post by Jeanne d’Orleans* over at Body and Soul with the great title “‘Cheap’ has more than one meaning, sweetheart.”

It’s a good overview of the perception (or lack there of) of labor and shopping politics in this country, and how it intersects with her own life. But what really bothered me is hearing about the Op-Ed at the New York Times not only not putting much value on the need for children to be taught history or geography, but not seeming to fully comprehend what is ailing our education system and exactly why those jobs go overseas.

*(Yeah, I know, what else is new?)