The Spouse, Kip, has many a time gleefully commented on how when ever we get together with friends,
a portion of the conversation is dedicated to blogs: ours, theirs and others. It is kinda funny, but as I
mentioned in this post, it provides a great launching point for further conversation.

On night when Kip and I were having dinner with Sara and Steve, the conversation turned to, yes, blogging, but also to websites in general. We were talking about statistic reports and referrers and Steve asked me what kind of queries took people to my site.

I told him that mostly it was people looking for a Jenn or Jennifer Lee in the many parts of the country I mention, or in comics, art or graphic design. The other popular variation is off of comics: about food, japanese, homeowning, etc. Until I made this post about bathroom tile and my mistaken impression of the manufacturers mark, that is, mistaking a dragonfly for a winged penis.

Then the requests got interesting, I mean, there were the innocuous requests about “bathroom tile,” “tile NTK,” “tile sticker manufacturer” and so forth, but also requests for “large penises,” “aladdin penis on the cover” (uh, that’s The Little Mermaid cover) and even “winged penis”. I checked the Google result on that
last one, my site ranked about nine on the list. A site that discusses genital amulets rated higher, and made for some interesting reading. But it made a simple search for “old dirty bathroom tile” seem suspect.

But that was nothing compared to the requests that came after my post about venturing into a local strip club. “I am very limber stripper,” “portland strippers +pictures,” “Female Body Builders having
sex”(got that five times), “free sex comics,” “Strippers Wanted-Boston” and the latest, “Halley Barry Porn”. That was the fourth time someone misspelled Halle Berry—I checked the rating on the Halley Barry variation and was amused to see my site was third, right behind Barry’s which was in second.

But it’s not all about sex, people have come by looking for “bombay bookstores for comics, ” a “picture of a haberdasher,” about “buying hardrives in australia,” even how to “order tofurkey in canada,” probably triggered by this post about food.

Some of them are just perplexing like “splashed cowslips thankful disgust wisenheimer” or “voicer cadillacs impregnate manley talkative”. And “fantasy love rape consensual” (I sense a contradiction).

And, people, please, stop looking for naked pictures of my friends. Just email them directly with your request.

Being very tired and having just gotten off a plane, it took me a moment to comprehend that the thing shaking in my coat was my cell phone. You see, I had gotten my cell phone a couple of years ago when I was going through some life issues that made the idea of getting a cell phone make sense. But after that particular bump on the road of life, I really don’t use the damn thing. Except when traveling.

So, I always feel a bit inept at cell phone ownership, the care and feeding thereof, not to mention answering the damn thing. I’m always startled into answering it when it goes off, sometimes against my will. And I have to remember to turn off the vibration option when I leave it on a table.

Anyway, it was Patrick Farley, calling to see if Kip and I were safely on the ground in San Francisco. We were in fact, waiting at the baggage carrousel. Patrick, out of the kindness of his heart, was coming to pick us up. This was on top of letting us crash at his house in Berkley during the Alternative Press Expo, or, more commonly, APE.

The table Christopher and I shared, surrounded
by the usual suspects.

(more…)

The media loves them some good tragedy.

Farewell, Columbia.

When traveling, the person you really need to get in touch with is unreachable.

Christopher, call me!

Macs and PCs still hate each other.

Kinko’s is Kinko’s is Kinko’s

Old Star Trek and modern day recreations of Old Trek both suffer from a severe lack of costuming sense.

Tired enough, I will sleep on plywood.

People who bring you food and coffee upon your waking are Gods.

Patrick Farley makes the best damn coffee.